Republicans don't kill Democrats; Democrats kill Democrats!

If you thought the wait for New Moon was something, prepare yourself for 2010, when Tom Wade's ballot-forging Democrats will--officially--begin tearing each other to shreds. Their treatment of Pete Grimm was only a sneak preview of the cinematic self-destruction that's bound to have observers wondering whether Wade's people have actual dynamite strapped to their chests.

After winning only 6 out of 19 seats on the county legislature, Boss Wade orchestrated the defeat of Pete Grimm, the lone incoming Democrat with any experience in the body, as minority leader. Grimm is a decent guy, and bears distinction as one of the only Democrats in Troy not facing indictment or a permanent ban from any public authorities, so we can understand why he wasn't getting along with the Wade crowd. In his place, Wade installed HUD Conroy disciple Pete Ryan, but his reasons for the move aren't clear. Ryan's tenure on the city council was sufficiently unimpressive that Metroland has been able to perpetuate the idea that Bill "Dormitory" Dunne was the intellectual heavyweight of the council Dems, which is hilarious in its own right. That doesn't convey the image of Ryan as leadership material, even by Rensselaer County Democrat standards, so we're going to be scratching our heads as we continue to ponder Wade's motives.

While Wade seems to be able to control four of his six county legislators, it's another story on the Troy City Council, where Wade put up a slate that Dr. Frankenstein could be proud of. The egos of Chappy, John Brown and Mike LoPorto could together make upstate energy-independent if they were fed through the turbines at the hydroplants, a fate which each one would most definitely impart on the other two given the opportunity. All three men have their eyes (or, with LoPorto, eyes and moustaches) on higher office, and all three know that they are in direct competition for every iota of positive attention on the Democrats, which will be scarce in coming months. We're saving our predictions of the actual casualty list until after we know who's going to be doing hard time for those ballots that forged themselves, but in the meantime, you won't need your reading glasses to see those knives getting sharpened during council meetings.

Cornered

Remember the Democrats who said that the GOP was doomed to be a party that could only win in the South? Those Democrats must have been absent from Rensselaer County for Election Night 2009, when the party of Obama and Paterson found itself getting relegated to the cities of Troy and Rensselaer. Democrats had their hats handed to them anywhere they didn't hold a sizable enrollment advantage. Republicans won both town board seats in North Greenbush, captured a 4-1 majority on the Hoosick town board and re-elected Republican supervisors in virtually every town. Even Democrat heavyweight Ginny O'Brien found herself outdone by a Republican candidate in East Greenbush. To Ginny's credit, she was able to read the writing on the wall, and jumped ship ahead of all four of the Democrats' county legislature candidates in District 2 getting blown out of the water.

While the Republicans find themselves worried about hosting so many swearing-in ceremonies, the Democrats are worried about the looming indictments of Troy Democrats involved in the absentee ballot scandal. Expect a messy fight for Troy City Council president pro temp as the Dems struggle for their share of the post-Chappy world.

The Official Rensselaer County 2009 Scandal Guide

Here it is: your indispensable, one-stop reference of misdeeds, dirty laundry and other essential information. We've sorted it by geography for your convenience. Enjoy!

Linda Gets The Kiss of Death

A reliable operative tells us that Linda Underwood is touting the endorsement of Senator Kirsten Gillibrand, and we have to say, that's brave. Not as brave as running in the wrong district or asking for votes from the taxpayers you've ripped off, but it's up there. Publicizing any association with Gillibrand that wasn't set at a Dartmouth fraternity house is a risky proposition, considering how rapidly Gillibrand malted her moderate shell after becoming a US Senator. In under a year, Gillibrand has become a patron saint of gun control, illegal immigrantion and funding ACORN--hardly mainstream values in Rensselaer County.

Let's not risk forgetting that Gillibrand went four for four in her 2007 endorsements: four endorsements, and four crushing defeats. Mayor Val Keehn, Supervisor Andy White, County Legislator Bob Zinzow and Councilwoman Sue Haynes all benefited tremendously from Gillibrand--before her most recent metaphorphisis.

A Ghost Story in Troy-2

Several sharp-eyed readers noted our omission of yet another brush-up between a Rensselaer County Democrat and the law: what about Bob, they asked. Indeed, our deepest apologies go out to Bob Martiniano, Democrat candidate for Troy City Council in District 2, for how could we forget about that cushy patronage job he failed to show up for last year? Alas, there's certainly no better time of year to talk about the Ghost of City Hall than on October 31st.

Bob got busted last June when a CBS 6 news crew decended on City Hall and got statements from city employees about Bob's failure to show up for work, even while collecting a five-figure paycheck from the taxpayers. He's definitely the favorite for the chutzpah award this year, because it takes a lot of guts to get caught ripping off the taxpayers and then offer them an encore performance. Actually having the audacity to campaign on the need to eliminate benefits for part-time employees makes Bobby a superstar in the cojones department (though, not a hypocrite, as he did not say anything about reductions for no-show employees).

If you feel that all these Democrat scandals are getting too numerous to track, relief is coming. We're working on a handy reference for you and other Rensselaer County voters so you can keep track of which misdeeds your local Democrat candidates have been caught up with. Check back Sunday evening for more.